Image Courtesy of CBC
Before discussing the events in Kingston this week, it is appropriate that we take a moment to show solidarity and support to the family of the victims and to the other victims of hate of all kinds. It’s all we can do at the moment. However, in the future…
Of course, that’s what our Prime Minister was doing on TV last week. But I couldn’t help but notice that some of the first words out of his mouth were, “This was terrorism.” Why was he in such a rush to make this classification?
What is Terrorism?
“The unlawful use of violence and intimidation, especially against civilians, in the pursuit of political aims.” A decent enough working definition.
What does this mean? It means that civilians are being used as leverage in someone’s battle with our government. In recent times, most often these terrorists come from outside our country. They are attacking our way of life, and our government is defending us. We are the good guys. The government is, too.
So They Are Not Our Fault
This absolves us of all responsibility. The terrorists have a political agenda that doesn’t agree with ours, and they are using illegal and immoral methods to achieve it. They are basically beyond our control. How convenient for the government.
This is not the case in Kingston. This guy is a home-grown hater. He was a local time bomb, and the clock finally ticked down.
We Created Him
He was brought up by our society, affected by our morals and values. It is the job of our government to protect us from such people: first, by recognizing them and stopping them, but second — and this is the important one — creating a society that does not produce them.
What’s the Cause?
Back before Mr. Trudeau was elected into a position of responsibility, he was a great fan of discussing the “root causes” of problems. The root problem in our society, which creates people like this, is our fixation with winners. When you make winning all-important, you push those who lose farther and farther away from the norm. They feel a lack of control over their lives. The situation is made worse if the person’s family and immediate society are either over-controlling or over-permissive.
The Key is Responsibility
Somewhere key in the development of a strong sense of self is the need for children to practise responsibility. If children’s upbringing is too structured, if the family always tells them what to do and how to act, they grow up never getting the chance to make choices for themselves, and this weakens the self-image. Paradoxically, if children are not given enough structure, then they also do not get any real practise at being in charge because there are never any consequences for their mistakes. This also damages the self-image.
Our Society?
And so our society, in its fascination with winning, destroys the child in two ways. First, if you aren’t a winner you’re a loser. Game over. But second, many adults over-react and never let their children compete. The constant moans about “participation medals” do have some validity. Properly structured competition is necessary, even if it’s only to do better than you did last time.
The End Result
And so, on the outer fringes of society, we have people who have a low image of themselves. This feeling of inadequacy makes them fearful, and that fear is easily twisted into hatred.
The Haters
If it helps any, these people do not start out hating you or me. They do not hate Muslims, or Blacks, or any other target. They develop hate because it gives them justification for bullying. They feel that they cannot control their lives, and they are frightened and alone. They are looking desperately for anything that will make them feel in control. So they look for vulnerable victims to bully. I guarantee that the man who committed the atrocity in Kinston sees himself as a loser. He looked around for someone he could dominate to make himself feel stronger. He looked for an example of someone he could follow. And it wasn’t hard to find. They’re all over in our society.
The Hate Mongers
Now we come to those truly responsible. These people also hate, but they are not powerless. They are the control junkies who get their pleasure from demonstrating their power over others. And the poor idiots in the last paragraph are such easy marks. All the controller has to do is give the perpetrator someone to focus his anger and fear on, and the job is done.
The Solution
The haters are followers. As Donald Trump so ably demonstrated, if the leadership glorifies strength over weakness, hate over acceptance, and manipulation over cooperation, then the losers will feel validated and follow along. Picture the schoolyard bully with his “posse” of hangers-on, and expand it to adult society.
But they are followers. If all of us are going in another direction and they are given no support for their evil attitudes and deeds, they will stop.
Mr. Trudeau and a lot of the people who form our government (and I mean all parties) are from the winning side of society, and if they are not careful, they become part of the problem, not part of the solution. Our society produces the haters, and they follow our leaders. Instead of denying responsibility, our leaders must give them better examples to follow.